There’s a lot of information out there about the dangers of snoring; snoring is bad for the health if it’s severe, such that it should be taken care of immediately if you’re snoring is particularly severe and may cause other health problems.
However, what’s not talked about as much is the impact snoring can have on the spouse who DOESN’T snore. Most people who snore severely are men, which means that most spouses who suffer the consequences of the snoring (namely, the noise they must put up with when they themselves are trying to sleep) are women. What can you do if your spouse snores and your own sleep is affected negatively as a result?
You’ve probably tried the old “turn over, honey” approach, which may or may not work to any great effect. However, if your husband’s snoring is such a problem that your sleep is fragmented and non-restful, it’s likely become a permanent problem that needs to be taken care of. Most obviously, of course, you need to have this problem addressed for your husband’s own health, but it needs to be taken care of for your health, too — and for the health of your marriage.
Get your husband’s problem diagnosed
Men are notoriously reluctant to go to the doctor and get any health problem diagnosed, but this is something that needs to be taken care right away. Although snoring can be caused by temporary conditions like a stuffy nose because one has the flu, permanent snoring is a different matter.
There are many different causes of severe and “permanent” snoring, all of which need to be addressed medically. For example, your husband may have a deviated septum that makes breathing freely impossible. Correct the deviated septum with surgery, and the snoring problem usually goes away.
However, most particularly severe snoring problems are caused by obstructive sleep apnea. Obstructive sleep apnea occurs when soft tissue at the back of the throat collapses in on itself during sleep. Although this causes the loud snoring that is so annoying to an ever-awake spouse, it also causes actual obstructive conditions whereby breathing temporarily ceases.
This not only impacts quality of sleep negatively (most people with sleep apnea never sleep particularly deeply, as is also true of their spouses), but it can actually lead to health problems like elevated blood pressure, stroke, heart attack, and chronic sleep deprivation that can be deadly and damaging over the long haul.
Most often, obstructive sleep apnea is present because someone is significantly overweight to obese. In that case, of course, the most obvious solution to the problem is to lose weight.
Using a CPAP machine to treat obstructive sleep apnea and snoring
Either as a temporary measure or because weight loss is unsuccessful, though, a doctor may prescribe intervention so that sleep apnea is conquered even before the weight comes off. (This is particularly important, since lack of sleep may also actually cause weight gain; by correcting the sleep apnea and making deep more restful sleep possible, this may actually also help with weight loss directly.)
If obstructive sleep apnea is present because of obesity or another problem whereby the back of the throat is inadvertently blocked during sleep, the doctor will probably prescribe what’s called a CPAP machine. CPAP stands for “continuous positive airway pressure,” and the CPAP machine blows air through the trachea, so that it stays open continuously during the night. This eliminates the snoring problem, for both the sleeping spouse and the one who can’t sleep because of the snoring.
It should be noted that the CPAP machine requires that the snorer wear a CPAP mask, which is certainly not necessarily sexy. However, because both spouses (snorer and “woefully awake” spouse) get a better night’s sleep with the CPAP machine, this is generally a very small price to pay for the less than sexy attire a CPAP machine requires.
It’s no mistake, either, that health problems aside, once snoring is addressed, both the spouses themselves and the marriage in general become healthier. Because both people in the marriage are now getting a good night’s sleep, emotions are not as raw and jangled, and moods are better. In general, couples are happier because the wife no longer resents her husband for keeping her awake at night. And the husband, who has been largely unaware of his own snoring, may have previously been resentful of her attitude. With it taken care of, though, spouses and marriage can become healthier and happier, together.
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